Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Quarter-life crisis

I knew it would happen. Everyone always told me it would happen, that someday, I would be happy to be mistaken for being eight years younger than I am.

That's the way the trend always seemed to go for me. You may recall that when I was 19 (almost 20), an employee at a restaurant thought I was 12. Twelve. That wasn't an isolated incident, either. And I had to work hard not to let it irritate me too much.

Now that I'm 27.5, I am just about at the point where I wouldn't mind being mistaken for someone eight years younger.

This paradigm shift brings me to two points: my high school's 10-year reunion, and makeup.

1. The reunion. It's next month, and even though everyone always says this, I really can't believe it's been 10 years. What is fantastic about the reunion is that they recently changed the venue (from a remote, distant vineyard) and the price ($75? I think, per person) to something infinitely more practical. They should have planned it this way to begin with, but it's now being held at a deli down the street from the high school, and the price of admission is $10. Everyone knows where it is; everyone can afford it. There's no longer any reason or excuse not to go.

Or is there? There is the oft-repeated argument that there's no use going to your high school reunion when you already keep in touch with everyone you care about. I would add that we have Facebook now. So is the reunion redundant? Did you go to your reunion, or will you when the time comes?

2. Makeup. I don't wear makeup. Should I? I don't have anything against it on principle. I'm just lazy and completely clueless. I would just go for it except that I feel like it's kind of a major commitment - if I start wearing makeup, I'll have to keep doing it or else it will just be weird and inconsistent. And I don't know if I'm up to it.

Discussion question: would wearing makeup actually make me look older, thus defeating my new-found goal of being mistaken for a 19-year-old more often?

Please to be sharing your thoughts. Thanks.


Suzanne Bubnash said...

I had the same problem of looking younger but love it now. At age 19 I applied for a job at a local company & when I handed the receptionist my application she said, "honey, you're not old enough to work here." I told her I was 19 and in my third year of college and said incredulously, "how old do you have to be, anyway?" She was mortified.

I have only attended one HS reunion--my 20th, only because I live so far away. My impression from what people say is that at the 10 year people are still trying to impress each other; at the 20, people are becoming comfortable w/ who they are, and after that, classmates are glad to see each other & enjoy catching up & don't care much about impressing others.

As for makeup, it enhances natural beauty when used w/ restraint.

Lark said...

Hey Bridget...long time, no blog (I have been a horrible blogger/blog reader lately).
Anyway, I didn't go to my 10 year reunion. Didn't want to...didn't really care to see a bunch of people that I didn't really care about seeing. When I graduated highschool, I was DONE. I still keep in touch with some highschool friends and am very content.

Makeup. My advice is if you do delve into the world of makeup, go to a makeup counter and get a makeover so they can show you what colors look good on you, etc. Plus, the makeover is free - makeup at the counter is expensive, but it can last you a long time. And, it doesn't make you break out like cheap makeup can. But, after you get a feel for colors that work for you, you can buy some cheaper makeup and be really happy. Target has some great makeup lines now (Sonia Kaskuk or however you spell that is really good.)
I think you are such a natural beauty, but as mentioned in the previous comment, it can enhance that natural beauty that you already have! So have fun...and good luck :)

Nancy said...

I have no plans to attend my hs reunions. I stay in touch with the people I like(d) and don't care much about remeeting everyone else.

Of course, it's no secret that I hated every blinking minute of high school and dropped out early. So maybe I'm an anomaly.

Make-up: I use blush most often, but not so much anymore. During "that time of the month" I get sicker than sick and turn as pale as a sheet. Since starting having kids/nursing I don't have those problems (nearly as often...like never, which I think rocks...is it wrong to plan your children so you never have to deal with a period again? j/k). But sometimes I put it on for a little extra glow or whatever.

Sometimes I will even put on eyeliner to make my eyes pop and sometimes will break out the lipstick I own. But that's rare.

I can't be bothered, mostly.

I learned to put on stage-makeup, and that's all. I am completely clueless when it comes to street makeup. :) I just tone down what I'd put on for the stage.

People always think I'm older than I am/was, which I think is fine. I look like my mom who, now in her 50s, is mistaken for being younger than she is. Maybe it's the best of both worlds...

Wow...I sound kind of grumpy. I'm sorry.

JackJen said...

1. I will NOT be attending my reunion. Even if it was free and in my backyard. No. Desire. Whatsoever. Now, if we decided to have some sort of COLLEGE reunion, I'd be there in a SECOND.

2. I didn't not wear makeup until this past christmas when the dark circles under my eyes became unbearable. (And after my pcp told me that no amount of diet changes would help...for some, it's just genetic). So I wear a foundation and powder around my eyes and that's it...and it happens (on average) twice a week...once for church, and once for random outings where photos might be taken. =)

JackJen said...

Okay....the first sentence of my comment should NOT be a double-negative. Oops! You edit the dictionary!

I didn't wear makeup until last christmas. There. Got it?

Amanda said...

1. I don't know about my high school reunion. I don't think they're made redundant by facebook because, although I can see pictures of what these people are doing, it's not the same as actually talking to them. But, I didn't particularly like a lot of them in high school, so do I want to make my way across state lines to spend an evening with them? I don't know.

2. I only started wearing makeup (regularly) a few years ago. I agree with Suzanne that it enhances what you've got when you think less is more. I think it also instantly makes you look more put together, which makes me, at least, feel more put together and less like a dead mommy. I'm also with Lark that you should go to a makeup counter. Tell them you want something really really quick and easy that you can do in 5 minutes or less.

Liz Johnson said...

I have no plans to attend my 10-year reunion, but it's in Mexico, so I have an awesome excuse. I think I would go if it were closer... but I don't really have a desire to go until we've all had 20 or 25 years to get over our high school weirdness.

Eh, makeup-schmakeup. I don't think it really does much to make a person look older. I agree that it can enhance natural beauty, but it's also kind of a money pit. That said, I very rarely go out of the house without wearing it. I wear mascara and cover-up, and occasionally add powder or bronzer to that (because I am pasty death-white). I figure if you don't wear it now, there's not much point to starting. I will admit that I do it 100% out of societal pressure and insecurity, and I keep thinking that I should stop. :)

The Ensign's said...

As you may already know I'm against going to my reunion. My thought is that your 10 year reunion is just a bunch of people being fake trying to prove something. I'd rather wait til everyone's grown up and maybe go to a 20 year reunion instead. I had enough of fake people 10 years ago. Why revisit that?

As for make-up.... I say if you have that natural beauty, which you do, then go natural. Besides what a great way to teach your kids they dont need it. Shay already asks me to put my sparkly eyeshadow on her.

Brittany Cornett said...

Reunion- If you are in town already. I say why not? But if it is costly to get there and you are not sure if you want to go I would skip it.
Makeup- I am all about the stuff you dont "have to" wash off. I use clear mascara and lip gloss. At times I have worn a little compact and eyeliner when I am going fancy but livig in Tucson and seeing some girls sweat off their makeup or streaked mascara from crying makes me want to stick my tounge out.

Bridget said...

The 10-year reunion might be a no-brainer except that Jeremy kind of regrets not going to his. It's kind of a non-issue, I guess, since I'm not going to be in town, anyway.

I am thrilled to be receiving makeup advice. You're getting me excited about it, especially going to a makeup counter. Lark et al, does that mean that I actually buy the products they suggest? Or do I just take mental note of the colors and go buy similar stuff at Target?

Liz, I feel the social pressure as well. Though I do like Amanda's point of feeling more "put-together" with makeup.

Lilianne said...

Ten year reunion? I'd totally love to go to mine. I loved high school and I consider myself a social person...so, I think it'd be fun to see everyone. I never tried to impress people in high school and wouldn't try to do it now. I still have people that I'd like to catch up with that I haven't since I graduated in 2000, so I think that would be nice. I think it's one of those "it's what you make it" deals.

And make-up...I'm a fan of four things: #1: tinted moisturizer (because you don't need foundation and I HATE it anyway...too thick and "make-uppy for my taste!") That way you are protecting your skin from the sun (they usually have SPF) and it gives you some sheer coverage to even out your skin tone. #2: bronzer and/or blush. A must have for me - otherwise I look like a cancer patient with all my pastiness. Couldn't live without it. #3: Mascara! This totally enhances your eyes and is so easy to put on and wash off. #4: lip gloss. A little bit a shine goes a long way.

And the best thing about it? The total time to put it all on is TWO minutes! Then if you want to buy a few eye shadow colors, you can use those for outings with the hubby or with your friends! That's my advice.

Good luck! You're a beauty, so I think you can't lose either way!

Mikael said...

are you going to the reunion? I don't think I am and I live 45 minutes away. You are right, I already know everyone I want to know.... I should post on this! haha.
And about the makeup, try it if you want to. But honestly, it is kind of annoying. it takes a good 10 minutes to put on EVERYDAY (sometimes 2x a day if I workout) and I look terrible without it!
you are naturally beautiful, stick with that :)
OH... and all the teens I teach think I am like 21 yrs old... YAY!

Shannan said...

Two things:
First - about looking young. I relate in how often I get carded (you don't have this issue as you don't drink alcohol, so bear with me). At first, I was always, always, always carded because I look so young. Even if I have my kids with me and I'm picking up a bottle of wine for dinner, I still get carded. Now, I'm 33. And for some weird reason, I'm not getting carded as much anymore. I know I don't look old for my age, it's just that I don't look 20 anymore. It is kind of sad to be moving on...

Next, I went to my 10 year reunion and it was a waste of my time. So much, in fact, that I went to the family BBQ social the night before, and remembered why I didn't want to go in the first place so I skipped the formal dinner on Saturday night. I don't think I missed out on anything. I don't think I'll go to the my 20 either.

About makeup, I have blond eyelashes and eyebrows, so I like to wear makeup just to bring out my features. I noticed that when I DON'T wear makeup, people often comment on how young I look. And I also get carded. However, I think I look better with makeup. So pick your poison.

Are you moving yet?

Linda said...

I have loved going to my class reunions, but mainly go to the first night where you can really talk to people one on one...its really fun to see how everyone has changed....the 10 year was fun to just see what everyone chose to do or what direction they headed...and had some great conversations at that one.

Honestly they would LOVE to see you and hear all the exciting things you have done! you would be THE STAR! The most interesting person there!IMPO

I have also felt that it was good for me to go as I always get questions about the church, as that is very different in the south, and they all knew me as a Baptist.

( I joined the church when I went to an in-state college, but away from home.) I went to my 20 AND 30 year reunion by myself, as it gives me absolute freedom to just visit with who I want to, as long as I want to, and not worry about his entertainment.

I have connected with people that I would not have expected to, been able to send people Book of Mormons, or other information, and had the most interesting conversations with people who I might not have hung out with in High School. I did grow up and graduate in the same town and so at the reunion I will see kids I was in Pre-school with. I like giving my childhood friends a hug.

It is also interesting now to see how long it takes me to recognize them. The men look OLD!

I have been tempted NOT to go, but have ALWAYS been glad I went. I am a very nostalgic person, though.

We always have the first night at the Bar and Grill owned by our class president. Just the fact I am not drinking is sometimes a conversation starter.

as for make-up...you really are so cute, why bother? I like to wear outlast lipstick but eye stuff always makes my eye water. Very occasionally powder /blush.

I really wish all women felt happy, beautiful and comfortable in their own best skin. Especially women who feel they can't leave home without it.

Enjoy being mistaken for younger!

Aimee said...

I am going to the 10-year, even though with "myface" I already know what a lot of people are doing, who has kids, etc etc. I am going because I miss my home, my family and my friends. I will hang out with my buddies and see some random people I haven't seen in ten years, all in all I think it should be a good time. I wish the organizers were a bit more organized, but I would go either way.

As for make-up I wear mascara and Dr. Hauschka tinted make-up with blush regularly. Occasionally, when I have a date with my hubby I wear eyeliner and eyeshadow. I think a little make-up is good, but too much is just too much.

Regarding the make-up counter I would get it done at Nordstroms (they are the nicest and most customer friendly). No, you are not obligated to buy. Tell the make-up girl that you are just looking because you have never worn make-up before and could they write it all down for you. That way they won't be expecting you to purchase and won't be disappointed.

Suzanne Bubnash said...

Funny what Linda said about high school reunion--"the men look old" & I agree. The men seemed pre- dominately heavy & balding--not that they looked bad, just their age. The women I would have known anywhere--they looked pretty much like they did in high school. I wondered, "for how many hours a day did they have to work out to get their high school bod back?" (and how much surgery?)

Camille said...

I never realized there were so many reunion-haters out there. I was in student government in high school so I think I will have to attend and do some of the planning. If it's not too much effort I would say go to the reunion. What's the worst that could happen and then you won't have the regret?

I agree with the comments about going to a make-up counter. I went a few years ago and told the person I had no clue about make-up and they gave me advice on colors, etc. To not feel too cheap I bought one or two items but bought the rest at Target with their ideas. I understand what you mean about long-term committment. I've never dyed my hair for the same reason. Once I add color to my hair won't I always have to maintain it or look riduculous? But then I will probably be the only 80-year-old who doesn't know how to dye hair and will look ridiculous then too.

Natchel said...

My first year of college, I was getting my hair done and the lady was chit chatting with me and asked what grade I was in. I told her I was a freshman and she asked what high school I went to. I had to explain I was in college and she still didn't believe me. Now that I'm married and have a baby, I feel like I'm 10 years old playing house and I feel like people look at me that way too. Maybe when I'm a super young grandma at 45, I'll feel better about it. :)
I am the laziest makeup wearer. I was so excited to get my Bare Minerals kit two Christmases ago because it was supposed to be so super flawless and quick. Well it turns out, I'm too lazy for even the quick. The makeup I own: Bare Minerals (which is really really great), drugstore mascara and eyeliner, and 2 eye shadows that I've had since freshman year of high school that are still going strong (that should give you a clue of how much I wear the stuff!). I got them at Sephora and the nice makeup man did my face up and told me the products he used and that I should buy. I could only bring myself to afford the eye shadows but I do really love them. When I get around to using them. I would suggest Sephora is the place to discover the makeup you should use. I use all of the aforementioned makeup maybe once a month, daily basis I use chapstick. :)

Lark said...

Bridget...you are so popular! About the makeup counter, you don't have to buy anything, but I will usually buy something that I couldn't buy somewhere else for less. Like mascara - just buy the cheap stuff at the grocery store/Target. I'll usually get the pressed powder/foundation at the makeup counter and maybe a lipstick or lipliner, etc. you'll know when you get it done. As to which makeup counter...I buy MAC makeup. They are at Nordstrom. Some girls have given me great makeovers and some I didn't like so much. Or you can just go in and ask for a suggestion for a foundation or just lipstick. They give you suggestions and let you try everything on until you like it - so don't settle for a look you don't like. I also like NARS (but its so expensive so I can never buy anything) and Stila is fun too. A lot of people use and like Clinique. They usually give you a "fresh" look.
Anyway, its worth trying out...it can be really fun...especially if you go with girlfriends - they love to share their opinions - which makes it more fun!

cait + brig said...

oh my goodness Bridget...i have been behind on the blogs and just saw Miriam singing Castle on a Cloud and 2-4-6-0-1! That is seriously hilarious. I miss her!

sarah said...

I think Lilianne's makeup advice is awesome. I was going to say you should just try mascara and lip gloss, but tinted moisturizer is a great idea too since it's pretty fool-proof - it'd be just like putting lotion on. Sephora is amazing! and also does free makeovers. They carry a lot of different brands, some very expensive. I've found the Sephora brand is just as good as any others. Target or Walmart(gasp :)) would be the cheapest if you dont want to spend a lot. Also, I've been told that eyeliner makes me look more awake when I'm tired.

sarah said...

oh and just a little blush can really make a difference if you're as white as i am. Having said all of that, I think you're very naturally pretty and don't need to wear makeup unless you wanted to!

Anonymous said...

Hi Bridget,

My 10 year high school reunion came and went. I never had any desire to go, but my high school experience wasn't a good one, and there are very few people I would want to see.

As for makeup...it can be fun, but there's certainly no need to use it unless you want to. I usually wear mascara and tinted moisturizer. Sometimes I wear lip gloss if I find it in my purse. I've noticed that using too much makeup or using unsuitable colors can make some people look older, and that's not the look I'm going for these days. :)


Crys said...

I wear makeup on Sunday probably because that is the day I see people the most and if I don't they say things like, "Wow you look really tired today? Are you ok?" Which I think is basically their way of saying, you look like caca what is up with you :) Haha! Makeup is one of those interesting things...your mom is right you need to be careful. Not enough restraint and people can look funny. Case in point, my mom's eye makeup at my sister's wedding. Can you say scary green! Since you are a makeup novice I would say, go light on the mascara, and probably avoid liner. This is a good time to try a bronzing blush since in the summer you can make it look like a nice natural tan :) Stay with very neutral colors on eye shadow. And go with a nice subtle lip color. I personally am a fan of lip stains. They don't wipe off though so you need to be careful when you put them on. I love to wear red, but it is not for the faint of heart. Personally I'm a huge fan of the mineral makeup. They go on a little lighter and practically every brand has a line now so you can get some reasonably priced stuff. Good luck :)

Adria Davis Tingey said...

This story is late, but I have to tell it because it is almost too perfect to be true, but is: I went through an anti-men phase at BYU (maybe as a reaction to some of the effects of being one of four females in my major) and I would probably still be in it if I still lived in Provo. Anyway, I refused to wear makeup, and after my dad and brothers had attempted to reason with me, I decided I would try it for one week, and then, if/when nothing in my life changed, I could prove to them that it was totally pointless and degrading. On the last day of my trial week the most sought-after man in the apartment complex joined the institute carpool. Afterward, he stopped me and said, "What's your name?" Response. "Adria, you have a really cool personality." Of course I assumed it was the makeup that was apparently bringing out my awesome personality and faithfully wore it from that day on. Now I often ask Garth if he noticed my new [insert makeup category] which he never does, probably just because my amazing personality is finally overshadowing it. I vote no makeup. And go gray with me when the time comes!

Teresa Jane said...

Bridget, I wear makeup about 50-75% of the time but I don't feel trapped to wear it. Maybe my look is a bit inconsistent, but I guess I just don't care. But I also don't look like a different person without it. I also still get mistaken for being 8 years younger, even with makeup. You should try it sometimes. I leave the house all of the time without it and I am just fine with that, whereas some people form complexes about that.

Teresa Jane said...

PS- I just but makeup at Target. I don't wear any type of powder or foundation, I only wear eye makeup. When I come visit you in Provo, we should experiment!

Jennifer said...

Jeff and I would have liked to go to the reunion, but the timing just didn't work for us. We would have loved it if it was later in the summer and we could have coordinated it with a trip to see family, etc. I think we would have had a good time, especially since both of us would have enjoyed being there. But, alas, we are not going.

As for make up, I often wear it all, but on the days when I'm really in a hurry, I always wear eye liner and mascara. If I don't, I get lots of "You look really tired" comments. Also, I have really found the some lipstick/lip color can make one look put together really quickly. That said, I only put it on before church each week. So if you're going to start, I'd start with those. Going to a make up counter is a good idea (I like Clinique), but be sure to tell them exactly what you want. Otherwise they will spend an hour on you trying to sell you their face wash, moisturizer, foundations, etc, etc. I have found it is worth it to pay a little bit more there for the items where color matters. Otherwise, I spend just as much buying two or three at Target trying to get the right color. But for things like mascara, the cheap stuff is fine.


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