Tuesday, March 10, 2015

All the Hats

Today I'm tired of wearing All the Hats. I know it may be a case of grass is greener, but what would it be like to just be one thing? Which, I know, moms never really are, but still. To either have a career and have the entire family rally behind you, or to be a mom, and rally your own dang self but do all the mom things wholeheartedly.

Instead, I'm up at 2am with the baby and then up at 6.40 to get the girls off to school and then out the door to go to work. Then I come home and plan a lesson and plan a dinner and brace myself for the school run and afterschool onslaught of chaos.

Wearing so many hats is really hard. Individually, I love all of them. I do. I love all the things I'm doing and I'm happy to be doing them. It just sometimes gets to be a bit much. And not just one kind of much, but a dizzying array of muches.

Write a final exam for next week. Learn that accompaniment well enough to record by tomorrow. The floor needs to be mopped. Groceries need to be shopped. Kid A is feeling a little sensitive today and needs extra loves. And x deadline for y loathsome, oft-put-off phone call to the bank in the US - motto for a UAE expat, "Where it's never a convenient time to call, literally, because of the time zone and working week difference!" - is looming. My to-do list is a bizarre hopscotch of tasks, each more whiplash-inducing than the last.

Anyway, I wrote this post in my head while I was complaining to myself about the amount of time I spent on food prep, cooking, and cleanup today, while performing said cleanup. Now that the downstairs is tidied and the kids are tucked in bed and I'm putting my hats on the shelf for the night, one by one, I'm feeling better. I'm glad to be doing so many fulfilling things. Really!

It's just hard sometimes, don't you think?

9 comments:

Glenda said...

My mom was a single mom with six kids. She worked and raised us and I often thought, "Shesh why isn't she doing a better job." Now I'm a stay at home mom of four and I wonder how she got so much done and why I'm not a better mom! I have no helpful advice just wanted to say Keep on Trucking! I'm always amazed by how you balance everything even on the days when maybe you feel like you are't balancing very well.

Amanda Ball said...

One of the best things I've ever done as a working mother is subscribe to emeals. It has taken all the stress out of food planning, about 20% of the stress out of grocery store shopping, and 30% off of food prep. It makes a shopping list for you, so Tyler can go to the store on his days off and I don't have to remember to plan or leave a list. He has access to all the recipes (as opposed to our old system of binders with pages falling out and pinterest boards and the green cookbook with the pumpkins on the front, but then it turns out it was in the white cookbook) and can make them if I'm not there.

They are balanced meals and, for the most part, pretty yummy.

And, yes, I understand completely.

Aimee said...

Yup, for sure. I think every mom feels you. Baby 3 for me has really added stress because he isn't a napper which makes it difficult to get things done. Add that to living in a fixer-upper for three years which we are slowly fixing up and I'm feeling rather fried. All that to say I wouldn't give it up because u love my life and my boys!

Kathy Haynie said...

It's so easy to get spread so thin. No answers, just lots of attagirl thoughts. I'm sure I would have loved my current professional life when I was younger…and I also know that I will always be grateful that I was able to be a SAHM until my youngest (of 5) was 3 - when I went back to college. It helps if in the middle of the chaos and crazies you are able to pick out the little moments that make your heart happy.

Bridget said...

Thanks for the encouragement and solidarity. Amanda, I am so intrigued by that program that I think I will do a free trial to see how it works with UAE grocery stores. It looks amazing.

Liz Johnson said...

Yep. I feel like I tried to wear all of my hats over the past week at the same time and ended up wanting to throw most of them in the trash. Between kids with stomach flu, attending a 44-hour birth, blogging, cooking, cleaning, straightening out an issue with my upcoming trip, and general life things... I swear, I was so exhausted. Also, I agree with your whiplash sentiment - sometimes I feel like I go from wiping vomit off the wall to trying to have a serious conversation with somebody about real things, and then back to listening to my kid talk about Minecraft. My brain does not have time to adjust to all of those separate levels. I envy Chris who at least has a 15 minute drive home to switch from work-mode to home-mode, whereas I go all over the place all day long. Yeesh.

Suzanne Bubnash said...

Yup, it's overwhelming. At times, something has to give, for a while at least. When I was spending my time at PT, OT, and Speech w/ a developmentally delayed child, it was almost a full-time job. I gave up little things that combined made a difference. Making my own pasta sauce, mopping the floor daily, etc. That ensured my survival.

Ariana said...

Some days I'd love to take a vacation from the hats and do my hair for a change. haha

Jenn Ridgeway said...

I second Amanda's suggestion! Since going to work full-time (with a 6 and 2 year old at home), I've signed up with CookSmarts meal planning service. The recipes are great, you can adjust portion sizes and trade out meals with previous recipes if you have favorites, and it compiles a weekly shopping list. It's saving our sanity and thus our family. This is not a paid advertisement...I just really like them!

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